They scammed me
They scammed me. The printer broke after a normal 'blob', which happens sometimes. Motherboard apparently broke after that. Support says "F__k off" to new motherboard, despite being in warranty in Sweden, and despite it being a normal occurrence. Immediately bought a Bambu Lab P1S. Never buying anything from Creality ever again. Donating the S1 Plus ($500+ down the drain) to someone who has the patience to buy and replace motherboard.